This is my life journal. I'm a Christian who is a happily married wife and mother.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Even Christians Get Depressed Now and Then...
"Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." Psalm 42:5 Sometimes Christian become sad or discouraged. Sometimes it is for no reason. Sometimes a person can have everything worldly desirable, and still feel down. I truly went through a two week period of feeling low.
"...so the king asked me, “Why does your face look so sad when you are not ill? This can be nothing but sadness of heart.” Nehemiah 2:2. For me I had two things bothering me, which I took to the Lord. One was an old friendship, which suddenly ended with no reason, and which I said a hurtful thing to the woman who had hurt me years ago. That alone could bring this thing on. Another friend, a neighbor has harshly judged me without cause. We even attend the same church. The Lord knows all about this and I will extend the hand of kindness to her anyway. The other was a concern that I was not exercising, which adds up to guilt. My heart and blood pressure need exercise even if my outer appearance testifies it doesn't. My doctor told me a year ago to begin an exercises program and I was too lazy to do this.
"You, LORD, hear the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry," Psalm 10:17. I prayed and laid my heavy heart before the Lord. I asked for forgiveness and for ability to forgive those who'd hurt me, and ability to get moving. Seven days ago I got on the treadmill. Before doing this I took an aspirin and ate a piece of Adam's real peanut butter toast on whole grain. I also had two cups of coffee and a large glass of water near the treadmill. I put on an old DVD sitcom and began walking. All I did was walk. I walked for 40 minutes. The next day I did the same and for the next six days I did the same with increasing amount of speed from comfortable speed of 3 to that of 6 for half a min. and back to 3 and so on. I am trusting the Lord and He is lifting my spirits. I am feeling better and love the new energy I am feeling each day. I have even got on the treadmill after dinner twice with my slow but steady pace. The guilt is lifting. I thank the Lord for His love and guidance and strength to do what I know is right. The friend whom I hurt has blocked me from being her friend on face book. That is okay with me. I don't have the depression anymore. I still don't understand, but I have love and forgiveness at hand.
I must be a lazy person, for I would not get on the treadmill. So for me, it took rigging up an old tv in the garage with a DVD player. I found this Dick van Dyke series at a thrift store for one dollar and it is now helping me to stay on that treadmill.
Some people don't need this kind of coaxing or coddling, but I do. I found this older sitcom, which is fabulous, called The Goldberg's. I love it. These are the kinds of things I need to get me on that treadmill, and I thank God for showing me how to stay on that treadmill. Instead of going to a gym and paying a lot of money, I buy DVD's at thrift stores.
Thank you blogging friends for being patient with me. When I am like this it is hard to post things. I am better now. We shall see how the next few blogging days go. God bless you and Happy New Year! Blessings, Kathi